My Afternoon Nap
Okay, so as most of my friends and family know, I’m pregnant. I actually have a bit more time to myself right now as I’m trying to stay rested. So this gives me some time to catch up on Buenos Aires Style – and talk about a lot of things old and new!
I’d really like to talk about the process of discovering the pregnancy here and all of the things that people have been telling me, etc etc – including the fact that a lot of people here think that pregnancy is a disability – it’s kind of funny!
Anyway, another thing that I’d like to write about are these weird dreams that I’ve been having since I became pregnant. I tend to wake up from my sleep and naps completely confused, sometimes with funny songs in my head and most of the time, happy and laughing. This is just a super cool experience, being pregnant.
So here’s dream sequence #1.
First I visited my sister’s ex husband, Barry. He was always so cool to me. We talked about the different ways of making duck confit. He said that instead of using duck lard on top and around the duck there was another way. He would stuff the inside of the skin with lard and then top it off with strawberries. So then i introduced him to Masterchef Australia and left. Then there was a part where I saw a mouse talking to a potato. This little gray mouse was so cute and had big gray mickey mouse ears.
Then I went to a firing range / bowling alley. I learned how to fire a shotgun. Then I saw someone looking like they were loosing control of their device (although it wasn’t a shotgun and it wasn’t a bow and arrow, it was more like a bazooka that shot things in slow motion, and the thing that it was shooting had a large pink balloon sign on it saying, “watch out”). I saw it coming towards me and just as I was about to run, I saw my cat, who normally is gray, but in my dream, he was like, photoshopped pink. I dropped my shotgun, grabbed him, and ran to the other side of the building before the explosion hit. He was scared and turned gray. I let him run knowing that he would come back to hang out with me when he felt less threatened.
Meanwhile, I went back to my place and someone was taking my shotgun and putting it back behind the counter. That was okay, I thought. i wanted to learn how to shoot a 9mm anyway. So I rented a Luger and went to the other shooting range indoors, I put my headphones on and started to shoot at the paper guy target. On my first shot, I missed, asked the guy behind me if i shot to the left or right, then adjusted the gun and shot again and again, hitting my target pretty well. I returned my gun.
I went back to the other firing range and began to do something (and saw my pink cat laying down by my place) around the bowling alley part. This part was separated by an arcade that was especially hard for me to get in and out of particularly since I felt larger than normal.
Then two kids wanted to talk to me regarding the explosion earlier and I didn’t think it was safe for them to come in via the shooting range, so I attempted to get out via the arcade, which was proving smaller and smaller every minute. I finally got out, but they were gone. So I made my way towards the bathrooms since I had to pee. I noticed that the guy running the place, keeping tabs on everything was a scruffy old guy, who was very course on the outside, but had a very nice smile and had a very sweet vibe to him. He gave out homemade cards to people who had screwed up their game. Just outside the bathrooms, there were people starting a karaoke machine. They started singing “Bad Bad Leroy Brown” and I knew they were singing about the old dude running the place. Everyone was laughing because they all knew that it was such an exaggeration of the truth, that underneath it all was this really nice guy.
As i reached the restroom, I saw a toilet and knew that I had to wake up to pee. But I woke up with this song in my head…
Jim Croce – Bad Bad Leroy Brown from Midnight Special \’73